Your Comic Book Personal Advice Of The Week

ALWAYS REMEMBER:



NEVER TAKE YOUR SUPERVILLAINY CUES FROM A BEYONCE SONG.

HAPPY BIRDDAY TO ME!

Wow, it's hard to believe that it's been two whole years since I, Kelly "Tex Aviary" DeBirde, started this blog dedicated to the SEXIEST members of the bird kingdom - CONDORS and BUZZARDS! Let's take flight down Memory Lane and check out some of our HAWTEST PICS!

Check out the wattle on this Condor Cutie!

H-A-W-T!

Not to mention this sultry plumed minx!

She's got the plummage to bring all the boys to the yard all right!

And this birdie is shy but not where it counts!

OH THAT BEAK I SWEAR IMMA GONNA FAINT RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW

And here's more SEXY BUZZARDS than you shake a claw at!

These are some DIRTY, DIRTY BIRDS!

But let's not forget the HAWTEST CONDOR PIC OF ALL TIME:

LITTLE IN THE WINGSPAN BUT SHE GOT MUCH PLUMAGE!

Is it hot in here . . . or is it JUST BUZZARDS AND CONDORS EN FUEGO?!?!?!?!?

REMEMBER - Post your own HAWT, HAWT links in the comments!



HAWT!!!!!!!!!!!!

BONUS VIDEO CONTENT:



TEH SEXIEST COMIC BOOK HERO EVAH!

Merry Christmas from me and The Venture Bros

Feliz Navidad! Thanks to the good folks over at Robot 6, I now have a link to every single Venture Bros. X-Mas song, including the new one they just let out today! Why, it's a Christmas Miracle!

Wherever you are, I hope you're enjoying a lovely holiday. Now, I'm off to eat my traditional X-Mas Tamales & Turkey with the family and hope I get gifts relating to Batman.

Merry Whatever, everybody!

Venturing Towards Christmas

On this quiet Winter Solstice, I wish you joy. And nothing brings more joy to me than hearing the cast of the Venture Bros singly treacly faux-carols!


(They do a new one every year but I can't seem to find any newer ones, alas.)

Speaking of horrible new Christmas songs, comedian/actor Patton Oswalt discusses what all bored kids did at some point to Alvin & The Chipmunks Christmas Song here (a tad NSFW due to language):


(I kid. Mostly. I actually loved that song growing up but Demonic Dave is always funny.)

While neither of these videos have the slightest relation to comic books, I do hope they amuse all of you. Perhaps Santa will see fit to bring me some comics for X-Mas and I'll blog about them then.

More importantly, I sincerely hope you all are having a lovely holiday season. I suggest you go here for an appropriately geeky Holiday wish of joy.

So, in closing, Merry Whatever And A Happy New Year!

Comics Interweb - You Have The Ability To Inspire Great Joy

So, check these awesome images out! (both courtesy of Ragnell)



The above is from an upcoming Marvel Series called Girl Comics. This series will feature some of the best and brightest female talents in the biz jamming on whatever they think is awesome. Clearly, this is great news (just ignore the rabble-rousers in the comments section at the above link to stay in a good mood).

And also? We all know about the Disney/Marvel merger by now but this giant picture by T Campbell and John Waltrip is beyond stupendous. I especially like Emma Frost and the Disney Princesses expressions.

Quick links to amuse and possibly horrify

This excellent part of a series about characters nobody likes coincidentally numbers a goodly number of Chris Claremont's kinky fetishes. All of which are troubling, of course, but none as bad as a certain reoccurring theme of Mr. John Byrne (yes, he's done that more than once). It kinda blew my mind that Magma was your entry character in that first Ultimate Alliance-y X-Men video game instead of Jubilee or Kitty Pryde.

Also, they're making a documentary about Grant Morrison's life. Hell, I'd watch it.

And in the spirit of the Season, Chris Sims has collected his 12 favorite DC Comics' Christmas Stories. Man, that Impulse story was delightful. I miss wacky Impulse.

On Jen Van Meter's Power Girl

Read here, here and especially here to understand the following.

From the Uncanny X-Men 80-Page Giant:

Armor: I never pictured you doing laundry. Aren't you a British Aristocrat?

Psylocke: Nobody else knows how to get the zombie ninja bits out of my costume.

Armor: I guess it is hard to clean a purple uniform made of unstable molecules that somehow always gets at least three large holes in it. What do you do about the oddly strategically placed holes?

Psylocke: They're called large cuts, you don't have to wash them. Look, don't you start with that. I'm trying to be nice here.

Armor: Oh, crap. No- I meant, the cuts from ninja throwing stars, kitanas and whatever. I would never joke about your costume. I love your costume.

Psylocke: Most women don't react quite that way.

Armor: Really? Because from a fighting point of view, it's perfect for who you are and what you do. It's all about contradictions.

Psylocke: Why, thank you, Armor! I've always-

Armor: See, the thong draws the eye precisely where everyone knows they're not supposed to look - putting anyone you're dealing with off-balance.

Psylocke: Ah. Yes, well, I just spent days fighting undead ninjas, so the, er, 'thong' didn't- you know, it's more of a bikini bottom, really-

Armor: See, the name says 'Psylocke', but the purple thong says 'Ninja Stripper'.

Psylocke: . . . excuse me, you cheeky little-

Armor: And not just "Ninja Stripper"! I mean it says "I'm tough enough to handle everything I am . . . including being an exhibitionist who's likely to die of exposure. Or maybe just from getting stabbed in an exposed thigh artery. Are you?"

Psylocke: . . . right. Emma Frost put you up to this, didn't she?

Armor: She gave me twenty dollars.

Psylocke: That bloody hypocrite.

Armor: Heh. Yeah . . . but seriously, what is up with that thong?

NEXT WEEK!

An Excerpt from the Tarot: Witch of the Black Rose 80-Page Giant

Tarot: . . . what is "Laundry"?

Raven Hex: I don't know. I think it's something you do when you actually wear clothes.

Happy Birthday To Me!

That's right, folks - yours truly is now a year older! Hooray! I know I haven't exactly been burning up the blogosphere with my posts but I hope y'all will be kind enough to wish me a happy birthday anyways, preferably in the form of amusing images and links. :)

Speaking of . . .

Trick or Treat!

A Happy Halloween and a Blessed Samhain to you all!

If you're looking for a good Halloween read, hunt down Evan Dorkin and Jill Thompson's Beasts of Burden. Helluva good series about neighborhood pets who fight the supernatural. Way less twee than you would ever suspect and damned creepy in parts. A damn fine read. Failing that, check out these pugs in superhero costumes! (I am easily amused)

If you want something to just give you the flat-out creepy-crawlies, I suggest hunting down the manga Uzumaki. It's the creepy tale of a town haunted by a spiral that makes people into freaks and lunatics via anything remotely "spiral" shaped. Some portions are just laughable (Deadly curly hair!) but the bit about the human snail . . . brrrr.

Lastly, enjoy this creepy Bonus Video Content! If you haven't played Batman: Arkham Asylum yet, btw, it's a terrific game . . . and the Scarecrow is one of the best parts. :D Enjoy these easter eggs - little taped interviews from the so-called Master of Fear in Arkham Asylum.

Helping women with Wonder Woman

Some of you may not know this but October 25th is Wonder Woman Day. CBR has an impressive rundown of the event by one of the founders here. This is a day to celebrate Wonder Woman, duh, but it's also for a great cause. Even if you're not going to be anywhere near Portland or New Jersey to meet famous comic book writers & artists, you can bid on awesome pieces of art done for the day online. Every piece of art bought goes to a very important charity - helping Shelters for Victims of Domestic Violence. I'm not terribly rich but I'm happy to donate time and attention to this wonderful day and wonderful cause. If you want to just stop reading here and click on over to thumb through the amazing gallery of Wonder Woman sketches for sale, I completely understand. Please donate even a little something, if you can.

Still here? Okay, time to get personal.

I know some people don't really "get" Wonder Woman and that's fine. Some people like chocolate, some people like rum raisin. What this day is, however, is a pure celebration of the spirit of the character as she's come to be known - the premier superheroine of the modern age. The character who little girls pretend to be when they play superhero, embracing the idea of the strong woman for the first time. Paradise Island, the Invisible Jet and the Golden Lariat are as part of the cultural landscape as Kryptonite and Alfred the Butler.

I know she's got her detractors but I love her. Yes, she's a deliriously complex character with so many facets that even great writers get a little lost getting a handle on her and too few even try. Still, that's part of why she's so fascinating. Batman, Superman, they can be summed up in a simple phrase or two. Wonder Woman - Diana of Themyscria - is a warrior and an ambassador of peace. Both an outsider and also the most trustworthy person in the DC Universe (even Superman doesn't have a rope brushing against his hip that renders him incapable of lying all the time). Complexity in comic book characters should always be celebrated and I love Wonder Woman as a character even when I don't care for her book.

To be honest, the last time I really enjoyed reading Wonder Woman was under Greg Rucka's pen (no slight to the fantastic Gail Simone but all the continual doses of tragedy and seriousness in her run leave me a bit cold). Greg Rucka wrote Wonder Woman as the one person in the DCU to have the strength to do what Batman and Superman could never, ever do (possibly should never, ever do, given their characters) and the heart to know what exactly what it would cost her. I know it put some people off but that? That's a hero I can both admire and understand. That's a soldier saving lives. That's a cop making a hard decision. That's a woman who makes hard choices. That's somebody I'd want a daughter to look up to as an example. Hell, I could make a long post about Rucka's Wonder Woman of it's very own but I won't, as it's already getting late.

In the end, I'm just thrilled Wonder Woman finally has a day to call her own. The fantastic cause it's supporting makes it even better.