Friday, February 6, 2009
ITEM! Kristen Bell Marries Chewbacca!
Now, I usually leave this sort of celebrity gossip and commentary for sites like Defamer (a high-quality site, I assure you)but I just thought you'd all be interested to know about this exciting new celebrity couple. How did Chewbarsten start, you might ask?
Friends say that the Wookie - already having surprised everybody in Tinseltown by ignoring his novel-based death to start appearing in guest spots on such shows as Ghost Whisperer, 24 and a two-parter on Grey's Anatomy - already had a crush on the petite actress. So when the talented star of Forgetting Sarah Marshall , Veronica Mars, and the upcoming Veronica Mars movie reportedly met Chewbacca while slumming it in wretched hives of scum and villainy, it was no surprise to anyone that sparks flew. Before you could say Kessel Run, the two took off to Vegas and got married!
"What can I say?" giggled a grinning Bell, "It was just love at first sight. He asked me to play pool and I just had to let the Wookie win."
"EYYYYYRRRRAAARRRRGGGG! WAAAAAUUUURRRRRRNNNNNNN!" joked Chewbacca to Entertainment Tonight.
"HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!" added Chewbacca, playfully putting his lady love in a headlock on the red carpet for her new film, Fanboys - a film which has already caused controversy on the Internet, much to everyone's shock and dismay.
Bell and Chewbacca seemed in too high spirits tonight to care about the whinging of nerds on the Internet, however, Bell's cheeks pink with glee as her Wookie lover continued to give her carotid artery a cheeky squeeze.
"EEUUUUURRRRRRUUUUU! RRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!" added Chewbacca with a big, toothy grin.
"Baby? Chewby? Chewby, baby, I- I can't breathe!" Bell said in response to further questions from reporters about the ceremony, their whirlwind romance and any future baby plans. "Seriously! Let . . . go . . . now . . . honey . . . I'm . . . passing . . ."
Ha! Adorable! It seems that Chewbarsten sure loves playing their cards close to their vest - or weird silver ammo belt as the case may be. Even so, The LookOut will keep all you faithful viewers updated on this hot, happening Hollywood Romance from their birds-eye view of LA in Colorado and at great personal risk to themselves! Because that's just how The LookOut rolls.*
BONUS VIDEO CONTENT!
*If forced to apply a geeky label, The LookOut is actually more of a Browncoat, a Dwarfer or a Scaper than a Star Wars fan but hey, those really doesn't work for the joke.